Cinder Read online

  “These are from me,” Cinder said. He picked up the smallest and set it aside, then handed the middle one to me.

  I opened it and discovered it was a photo printer, but I wasn’t sure if I could just plug the camera straight into it, or how it would work since I didn’t have a computer. I gave him a cautious smile, but before I could thank him, he lifted the biggest box, which I discovered was quite heavy as he set it across my lap. I couldn’t contain my gasp as I opened the paper and saw it was a laptop.

  “Cinder, I can’t accept this. It’s too much,” I protested.

  “You’ll need it to go with the printer. And if you don’t use it and the printer, then how will you use half of your other gifts?” he asked. “Don’t worry about the cost, sweetheart. It’s the first birthday you’ve celebrated in a long while. We wanted to make it special.”

  I looked at him. “You planned this.”

  “Not exactly. Irish told me what Janessa was picking up, and I decided to get you something to go with it. You can also access the wi-fi on the laptop. If you ever decide to look for your family, I wanted to make sure you had a way to do it without having to ask for help,” he said. “But just so you know, Shade would gladly do some digging if you ever asked.”

  Cinder picked up the smallest and last box. He rolled it between his fingers before handing it to me. Clarity removed the laptop from my lap and shifted it over to the table of opened gifts. I stared at the tiny box and realized it looked like something jewelry would come in, but I dismissed the thought as ridiculous. It was probably just some small thing that went with the laptop or camera.

  I opened the paper and stared down at the box that most definitely contained jewelry. My hands trembled a little as I opened the lid, and I gasped as I stared at the beautiful necklace inside. A hummingbird hung from a delicate gold chain. The body was an emerald and the wings were made of amethyst.

  “It’s beautiful,” I said.

  “You deserve something pretty and shiny,” he said. “The hummingbird reminded me of you. Delicate but determined to survive.”

  My eyes teared up again as I looked at him. “Cinder, I… thank you. It’s the best gift I’ve ever received.”

  He took the box from my hands and removed the necklace, then fastened it around my neck. On impulse, I moved in closer, my breasts pressed against his chest, and brushed my lips against his cheek. My heart felt like it was beating out of control, and I’d have sworn the room was spinning. Our gazes met and held. The noise of the party faded and it felt like it was just us in the room. He reached up and caressed my cheek and I leaned into his touch. This was the closest I’d been to a man since being rescued, and it felt incredibly right. I’d thought being touched like this would freak me out, but I found that I never wanted this moment to end.

  “Happy birthday, Meg,” he said, his voice deep and gruff.

  “It’s the best birthday ever,” I said softly.

  “Cake!” Jordan yelled.

  I jolted and looked around, noticing that most of the club was trying not to look our way, but a few were smirking in our direction. I felt my cheeks warm and I wondered if I should get up. Cinder seemed to make the decision for me when he tightened his hold and shifted us a little so that I could blow out the candles on the cake when Havoc carried it over.

  “We didn’t know what kind you’d like so we just got a plain white cake with whipped frosting,” Josie said.

  It said Happy Birthday Meg in purple frosting, and there were confetti sprinkles on the corners. Janessa took a picture of the cake with the candles blazing, one of me blowing them out, and another as Clarity was slicing and distributing the birthday cake. I got the first piece, one that was much too big. Cinder waved off the piece offered to him, but I couldn’t let him go without at least a little taste.

  I cut off a bite and offered it to him. He watched me intently a moment before accepting the cake. I gave him a slight smile before cutting off a bite for myself. I offered him a few more, and it had to be the sweetest moment I’d ever shared with someone. I’d thought I would hate my birthday for the rest of my life, but I knew this day would be one of the best memories I ever had. I saw a flash go off when I fed Cinder another bite and glanced at Janessa right as she winked and moved off to take pictures of everyone else.

  The party seemed to go on for hours, but people started heading off to do their own thing. Eventually, it was just me and Cinder with empty pizza boxes, birthday cake crumbs, and my stack of presents. I’d let the kids take the balloons with them, loving the joy on their faces over something so simple.

  “I’ll have Killian or Dixon deliver your presents to your place. They can load them into one of the SUVs and drive them over,” Cinder said.

  I swallowed hard and looked down at my lap. I knew the day would come to an end, that we’d part ways, but I wasn’t ready. I didn’t want to be alone today, not even for a second, but I also wasn’t brave enough to ask to stay with him longer. Was I?

  “Do you have plans tonight?” I asked.

  “What did you have in mind?” he asked, drawing my gaze back to his.

  “Could we watch a movie together? Or maybe play a game or something?”

  He rubbed my hip and warmth spread through my body as tingles raced down my spine. I felt my nipples harden and I hoped he didn’t notice. I didn’t understand why my body was reacting the way it was. I’d never desired anyone, not really. I’d had a crush on a boy in high school, but that seemed like forever ago, and it hardly compared to how I felt right now.

  “Scared to be alone?” he asked.

  “Something like that. My place is too quiet and I don’t want to ruin today with bad memories.”

  He studied me and I tried not to squirm. After a moment, he came to a decision, but it wasn’t what I’d expected. I’d thought he’d offer to watch one movie, then send me on my way.

  “Why don’t you stay tonight at my place?” he asked. “You can have your own room, so don’t feel like I’m trying to take advantage of you. I won’t even touch your hand unless you say it’s okay.”

  Stay with Cinder? Overnight? My heart started racing again. I didn’t know what it was about him that made me feel so safe. He’d been there the day I was saved, even though he hadn’t seemed all that thrilled with bringing me and the others home when they’d left Colombia. I knew Jordan had instigated it, and I would be forever grateful. As the other women had moved on, I’d worried that the day would come when Cinder would tell me it was time to leave.

  I’d thought at first that it was the compound that made me feel secure, the gates and fence that would keep bad men away. Then I’d started cleaning Cinder’s house, doing his laundry, making meals for him… and I’d quickly realized that it was him who made me feel safe. Even though he grumbled a lot, barked orders at people, and didn’t seem to care for my singing, I’d known that with him around, no one was going to hurt me ever again. Despite what some of the people in town said, I knew he was honorable. I’d caught him without his shirt one day and I’d noticed the tattoo on his bicep, one I’d seen before. I didn’t know when or how he’d served, but Cinder had been a Marine. Or as my friend’s dad had once told me, once a Marine, always a Marine.

  If I couldn’t trust a Devil Dog, then who could I trust? Just because he might not walk on the right side of the law these days didn’t mean it had always been that way. I was sure he had a reason for doing things the way he did. Maybe seeing war had soured him on life at some point. I might never know, but what I knew without a doubt was that the man currently holding me as if I were fine china would never hurt me. Not intentionally.

  “If you’re sure I won’t be imposing, then I’d love to stay with you tonight,” I said.

  “Wouldn’t have offered if you’d be in the way,” he said. “Your place unlocked?”

  I nodded. I’d been assured that I didn’t have to worry while I was here, that I would always be kept safe. Even when those men had taken Janessa, I’d still not be
en afraid as long as I remained behind the gate. I was protected here, and I wasn’t ready to leave anytime soon.

  “I’ll ask someone to drop your presents off and leave them inside your door,” he said.

  I got off his lap and waited while he made arrangements for my presents, then I walked alongside him as we went to his place. Cinder’s house felt more like a home to me than mine did. Maybe because I hadn’t really made the place mine. Even though his space was bare as far as pictures or knickknacks, it still seemed cozy and comfortable. I liked that it was all one floor and not a two-story like some of the other houses at the compound.

  What I liked most about the place was that it belonged to Cinder, the one man I trusted with my very life. I didn’t know what to expect of tonight, but I knew that being here with him, being close to him, felt right on so many levels. I also knew that he wasn’t the type to settle down. If he hadn’t been married yet, then it was doubtful he ever would, especially not with someone like me. Even if we only had this one night, I would cherish the memories always.

  Chapter Three

  Cinder

  I was going to hell, assuming this wasn’t it already. Having Meg in my lap earlier had felt a little too damn good, and now she was cuddled against my side like she belonged there. The scent of her, the feel of her soft skin and hair, was driving me crazy. I was a grown-ass man and knew how to keep myself in check, but fuck if I hadn’t been hard since she’d tumbled onto my lap at the clubhouse. Being the idiot I am, I’d kept her there. I’d caught the looks from the others, but they were wrong. Just because I had a soft spot for Meg didn’t mean that I was going to marry her and settle down.

  I just needed to get laid. Trouble was that I didn’t find anyone appealing these days. I’d had offers, and turned them all down after that last one-night stand roughly six months ago, and that sin had come knocking on my door today by way of an angry husband. Just proved that you couldn’t trust a woman, or at least the ones I seemed to attract. When I’d been younger, I’d been chased by women who wanted a ring on their finger and a military man on their arm. I hadn’t fallen into their traps, and I didn’t plan on landing in any now.

  Meg laughed at something happening on TV but I hadn’t even been paying attention. She’d asked to watch a comedy, something lighthearted. It hadn’t mattered to me what was on as long as she was happy. That was another thing that bothered me. I didn’t give a shit if a woman was happy, not usually. I wanted my men’s wives and old ladies to be happy because they were family, but Meg was just a stray who wouldn’t go away. She’d had nowhere to go when Jordan had said the women were coming with us, and even though the others were long gone, she remained.

  I didn’t like the way my body responded to her, didn’t like the way she was on my mind more often than she should be, or that I gave a shit at all what happened to her. Instead, I found my heart aching for all she’d suffered and wanting to see her smile. I hadn’t even hesitated to set up a party for her when she’d told me about the last ten years of birthdays, knowing that I needed to give her some good memories. It hadn’t escaped my attention that Irish and Janessa were matchmaking. I’d have to speak with them later and tell them to back the hell off. I didn’t want Meg getting the wrong idea. I already cared too damn much about the woman as it was, but there wasn’t a future for us.

  My VP was nearly as damn old I was, but he had kids, and there were plenty of youngsters in the club for someone to take over when I decided to step down. Not that I planned to do that anytime soon. I might be nearing sixty, but I had a lot of life left in me. This club was all that mattered to me, and even when I took a step back, I’d still be a part of it. And like it or not, Meg was quickly becoming part of the Devil’s Boneyard, which meant she mattered to me. That’s all it was, her tie to the club.

  I nearly snorted, not even believing it when I said the words to myself. No, whether I liked it or not, Meg mattered to me not because of the club but because of who she was. I’d never met a sweeter woman, except possibly Clarity. Even Clarity had more fire in her than Meg did, but Meg had shown me a side I’d never seen before tonight. She was also a protector. I hadn’t needed her help, and it pissed me off that she’d gotten in the way of that hothead, but it also made me feel all warm and funny that she’d cared enough to try to help me.

  She kept fidgeting with the hem of her dress and I wondered if she was uncomfortable. I hadn’t exactly given her a chance to go back to her place for a change of clothes. I patted her as I stood up, and she blinked up at me, looking insecure and uncertain for a moment. I wanted to kick the shit out of every man responsible for that look. She was like an abused puppy, waiting to see if her new master was going to hurt her too. Oh hell. I closed my eyes and nearly groaned at that thought. Meg on her knees, hands in her lap, and staring up at me with those wide eyes, waiting on her next order.

  Fucking. Hell. Yeah, good ol’ Lucifer was definitely holding a place for me, likely at his right-hand side. Move over, princes of hell, because I was going to give them a run for their money at this rate.

  “Something wrong?” she asked. “Should I go home?”

  “You’re fine staying here, but you’re uncomfortable. None of my pants will fit you, but I have a shirt that will be long enough to cover everything important. The material should be more comfortable than what you have on right now.”

  She slowly stood and smoothed her dress down, the dress that was giving me impure thoughts no matter how demure it might be. I’d never seen her in one before, and now that I’d gotten a good look at those tempting legs, I was having a hard time not picturing them around my waist. Hell, maybe I wasn’t going to be sitting at Lucifer’s side. Maybe I was going to dethrone him and just take over.

  “Y-you want to lend me a shirt?” she asked. “One of yours?”

  I nodded and waited to see what she’d make of that. I had no idea what went through her mind most days. She’d either take it as a genuine offer for her comfort, or see the depraved thoughts going through my mind and run like hell. I wouldn’t blame her for taking option two.

  “I’d like that,” she said.

  She followed me to the back of the house, and we stepped into my bedroom. She’d been in here before, but never with me. I went over to the dresser and pulled open the second drawer, then picked a shirt I knew was soft and on the long side. I handed it to her, then started past her, giving her privacy to change, but she placed a hand on my arm and stopped me.

  “Thank you,” she said. “For everything. The party was wonderful, and I’ve enjoyed spending time here with you tonight. I know I’m a needy mess and you’re probably looking forward to the day I leave, but I appreciate everything you’ve done for me.”

  “Not kicking you out,” I said, my voice gruff as I fought down my emotions.

  “That’s because you’re a good man. And don’t try to shrug me off and say you aren’t because I know different. I’ve seen evil, Cinder, looked it in the face every day for a decade. Just because you may not do things in a one hundred percent legal way doesn’t make you a bad man.”

  “Don’t make me into some sort of saint, Meg. I’m not. I’m just a man with faults and desires like everyone else.”

  She nodded and let me go, taking a step back and clutching the shirt to her chest. I turned to go and pulled the bedroom door behind me. At the last second, I looked over my shoulder and couldn’t contain the growl that rose in my throat. She’d already pulled off her dress and had a large bruise on her abdomen from the jackass who had hit her earlier. Not caring if I scared her, I slammed the door back open and stormed inside. Her eyes went wide and she whimpered as I got closer.

  “When were you going to tell me?” I asked.

  She stared, her heart beating so hard I could see it thumping inside her chest and in the pulse point in her neck.

  “The bruise, Meg,” I said, waving at her stomach. “When were you going to tell me you were in pain?”

  She glanced down as if ju
st realizing it was there. “It’s not the first one I’ve received. It will hurt for a while, and then it will fade.”

  I pinched the bridge of my nose and closed my eyes to contain my anger so I wouldn’t lash out at her. After counting to twenty, then doing it again backward, I opened my eyes and looked down at her. She didn’t seem all that bothered by the fact she was nearly naked in front of me, and I wasn’t sure if I liked the fact she trusted me that much, or felt insulted that she didn’t think I’d ever make a move on her. She was right, though. I wasn’t. Or rather, I didn’t plan to make one. Having her so close was fucking with my head, though, and I was wanting things I shouldn’t.

  “You need to ice it and take something for the pain,” I said. “Get changed and I’ll have an ice pack ready when you get back to the living room.”

  She pulled the T-shirt over her head, then reached behind her. I watched in fascination as she pulled her bra off through the sleeves of the shirt and let it fall to the floor. I’d heard of women who could do that, but I’d never seen it happen firsthand. Impressive. And oddly, a big turn-on. Or maybe it was the fact I knew she only had on a pair of panties under my shirt.

  Meg moved closer and reached out, sliding her hand into mine. It gave me a jolt, not having expected her to do such a thing. The kiss on my cheek earlier had shocked the hell out of me, and now she was holding onto me as if it were the most natural thing in the world. For a woman who never wanted anyone to touch her, she was making a lot of bold moves tonight. Someone else might have acted on that show of trust, but I knew I couldn’t offer her what she needed.