Savior (Dixie Reapers MC 16) Page 2

  “How do you know Saint?” the man asked, not even bothering to look at me.

  “My ex-fiancé is a friend of his,” I said.

  I saw Saint wince and look away. I hadn’t spoken to Jeremy in a long time. For all I knew, Saint hadn’t kept in touch with him. I certainly hadn’t kept up with Saint. But then, he and Jeremy had been close. I’d only tagged along because I’d been engaged to Jeremy.

  “You’re Sonja’s foster sister,” the man said, finally lifting his gaze to mine. I stared, dumbstruck by how handsome he was, and couldn’t manage to do more than nod. He didn’t say anything, and I realized he wanted a verbal answer.

  “Y-yes,” I said.

  “You expect me to believe you had no idea these kids weren’t hers?” he asked.

  “I didn’t think it was likely, but she denied they didn’t belong to her. She set us up in this rental, then she’d disappear for a while. Sonja only came back to check on us and leave some money. Then she’d disappear again.”

  My stomach knotted. The fact they were here, and Sonja wasn’t, made me think she’d never return. Had they hurt her? And why had she tried to keep the children from their dad? I didn’t understand any of it. When we’d been in foster care together, we’d often talked about our families, and how much we wished we had a dad or mom who’d wanted us. So why did she take Junie and Judd from people who clearly cared about them?

  “You didn’t find it strange she didn’t come back for several months?” the man asked.

  “It worried me, but it wasn’t like I could leave and go look for her.”

  His gaze dropped to my legs, and I felt my cheeks burn. I’d gotten used to the stares and questions since the accident. Except he didn’t ask why I was in the wheelchair.

  “You know you can’t keep the kids,” Saint said. “They’re coming with us. The little girl belongs to our President. He’s the one kneeling in front of you. The boy belongs to a brother who is no longer with us, but someone will take him in. They aren’t yours, Dessa.”

  Little Junie whimpered, and Judd leaned into me. I heard a soft Momma before he buried his face against me. I knew their President heard it too, from his sharp inhale and the way his gaze jerked to mine.

  “I didn’t tell them to call me that,” I assured him.

  “Someone get their things,” the man said, then stood. He reached down and plucked Junie from my lap, cradling her against his broad chest. She stiffened a moment, and I worried she’d pitch a fit. But after a moment, she laid her head on his chest and closed her eyes.

  “I’ll go to their room and pack their clothes,” I said, my throat feeling tight and raw. My eyes burned, and I knew I was close to crying. Someone came to take Judd from me, and I turned my chair and wheeled it down the hall to their bedroom.

  As I shoved their things into a duffle bag, I let the tears fall.

  Sonja was gone now. With Junie and Judd leaving with the men, I’d be alone. Trapped. What would happen when I couldn’t pay the rent? Even if I got an eviction notice, it wasn’t like I could leave on my own. I didn’t have transportation, other than the wheelchair.

  I swiped the tears off my cheeks as I finished packing the children’s clothes. Then I started on the few books they had, and their toys. I set the bags into the hall, then wheeled myself farther into the house and into my room. It was cowardly to hide, but I couldn’t stand the thought of telling those sweet babies goodbye. I already felt like someone had ripped out my heart.

  “Dessa, want me to call Jeremy?” Saint asked from the doorway.

  I gave a humorless laugh. Right. As if Jeremy would give a crap about me. He hadn’t in a long time, and I didn’t think he’d start now. “There’s no one to call. Just go. Take the kids and…”

  I bit my lip so hard I tasted blood. I heard him walk away, and I let myself break. I cried so hard my throat ached and my nose ran. It wasn’t that I hadn’t been alone before. I had. But when Sonja brought those small children to me, I’d felt hope for the first time in so long. Now those men were taking them away, and I’d never see them again. Any chance I had at having a family had just been yanked out from under me.

  Someone spun my chair around and I screamed, gripping the armrests. My eyes went wide as I stared up at the scariest man I’d ever met. His jaw tightened and his nose flared as he stared me down.

  “You can cut the shit. You might have the others fooled, but you couldn’t have been stupid enough to not realize those kids didn’t belong here. You didn’t care, though, did you? They made you feel important. You come after them, and I’ll make you regret it.”

  I shook so hard, I worried I’d vibrate out of my chair. My bladder felt like it might release at any moment, and I hoped it wouldn’t. The man terrified me, but I didn’t want him to know it.

  “I’m stuck in this chair. Even if I weren’t, I’d never try to take them from their father,” I said.

  He gripped my chin so hard it hurt. “Sonja was a fucking bitch. For your sake, I hope you’re different. If you aren’t, I’m happy to bury you right beside her.”

  I whimpered and tried to wheel my chair away from him, but I couldn’t. He snarled and got in my face. Oh, God! He’d killed her! Did Saint know? Had he been part of it? I’d felt safer when he came into the house. Now I wondered if he was every bit as monstrous as this man.

  “Tempest,” someone shouted.

  “Coming.” He released me and walked off, pausing in the doorway. “I meant what I said. Don’t come looking for those kids. Stay the fuck away from them. Because if you don’t, I’ll make you sorry you were ever born.”

  Too late. Someone already beat you to it. I already regretted it every day. Ever since Jeremy walked out on me, ended our engagement, and said he couldn’t be with a broken woman, I’d struggled to keep living. Before I’d met him, my life had been miserable. No one had ever given me a second look. Until the day Jeremy asked me on a date, I’d never had a boyfriend. He’d been my first date. My first kiss.

  Sonja was gone. The children too.

  Would anyone miss me if I disappeared? If that man did come back, and he buried me next to Sonja, how long before anyone realized I was gone? Would they ever? The landlord wouldn’t care. He’d just think I skipped out on rent. I couldn’t think of a single friend, and I didn’t have family anymore.

  I was alone. Again.

  And this time, I wasn’t sure I’d make it back into the light. I felt the darkness pulling at me, trying to drag me under.

  I stared at the floor long after the men left. My appetite had fled, and I couldn’t bring myself to go watch TV. I hadn’t even checked the door since they’d broken in.

  None of it mattered.

  I looked at the bed and wheeled myself over to it. I locked my chair into place, then started the process of dragging myself onto the mattress. Nothing was quick or easy anymore. Something as simple as rolling over in bed now took several minutes. Curling around my pillow, I fought the monsters inside my head. The voices whispered to me, no matter how hard I tried to ignore them. You’re worthless. Stupid. No one wants you. You should give up.

  I’d heard them all before. Would this be the time they won? Or could I claw my way back again?

  Did I even want to?

  Chapter Two

  Savior

  Something felt off. For one, both kids had been screaming since we walked out of the house. Judd kept asking for his mom, which I assumed meant Dessa. And second… I wanted to hate that woman. She’d kept my daughter from me, but she claimed she hadn’t known. As fucked up as Sonja had been, it was possible she’d lied to her foster sister. What if Dessa was just as much a victim in all this as I’d been?

  Tempest had laid into Dessa. Any other time, I’d have pulled him back. I’d heard it all and had decided not to intervene. I’d noticed the way Saint shifted uncomfortably, which meant he knew something the rest of us didn’t. He’d known who she was and seemed surprised to find her there. Where had they met? What was she to him?

  We pulled off the highway to fill up the tank, and I wanted to grab some snacks for the kids. The more upset they became, the more I wished we’d thought about bringing an old lady with us. Any of them would have known what to do in this situation. Saint had kids, and so did a few others. I’d jumped into fatherhood with a teenager, so I didn’t know shit about small children.

  While someone pumped gas, I got out to stretch my legs and go into the convenience store. I grabbed two bottles of white milk and perused the snacks for something that seemed appropriate for toddlers. Wraith had tagged along for the trip and rolled his eyes at me when he realized my dilemma.

  “Here,” he said, pulling down two packages of animal crackers.

  I grabbed a soda for myself, then went to pay. While I waited, I wondered if we’d done the right thing. Sure, the kids belonged to the club. But Dessa had seemed devastated over the loss of the children. She lived too far from the compound for us to offer visitation. Assuming she was truly innocent in all this.

  I’d heard Tempest laying into her and knew I should have stopped him. I didn’t know what crawled up his ass, but I’d have to figure it out sooner or later. I couldn’t have him going off half-cocked again. I knew he took his new role as Sergeant-at-Arms seriously. However, threatening a woman was going too far, especially when she claimed to be innocent.

  The children adored her. That much was clear. I still didn’t know where I’d put Judd when we got home. I’d already fixed a room at my house for Junie. Since Merlin was no longer breathing, and I had no fucking idea where Judd’s whore of a mother had gotten to, it left me with a problem. No one had come forward and asked to take him in. As the President, maybe I should do it. He and Junie had lived together for at least three or four months, maybe l
onger. After separating them both from Dessa, how much trauma would they suffer if they had to live apart from one another?

  I stepped outside and motioned to Saint, who remained on his bike not too far away. He walked over, and I noticed he scanned the lot along the way. It was a habit most of us had, always aware of our surroundings. As a kid, he’d had to grow up too fast. Since joining the Dixie Reapers, he’d been through a lot of shit, and I trusted him. Not only to have my back, but to be truthful.

  “What is it, Pres?” Saint asked.

  “The woman. Dessa. How do you know her?”

  He rubbed the back of his neck. “We weren’t close or anything. Remember my friend who helped Kayla?”

  I nodded. I didn’t remember much, but I did recall some guy not only saving Kayla from a rogue Prospect, but he’d also brought her home. Which was when Preacher found out he’d knocked her up, and he’d decided to claim her. Seemed like forever ago. Now their twins were all grown up and living their own lives. Shit. Made me feel old.

  “Jeremy came back here once he’d handed over Kayla. He’s never dated anyone seriously. Until Dessa. One day, I came up to visit and found out they were engaged. She knows me as Johnny because that’s what Jeremy still calls me. I let it slide since we’ve known each other so long. I hung out with them a few times. She seemed sweet.” He cleared his throat. “A drunk driver hit them one night. It totaled Jeremy’s car, but he walked away with only bumps and bruises. Dessa’s legs were pinned under the dashboard. She has nerve damage, which means she has some feeling in her legs, but she can’t walk.”

  “What aren’t you telling me?” I asked.

  “Jeremy couldn’t handle it. Still can’t. Every time he sees her, he feels guilty. Even though it wasn’t his fault, he blames himself. A few days after the accident, he broke their engagement. Walked away and never looked back. That was about ten months ago, I think. I lost touch with her. We hadn’t really been friends. Only acquaintances through Jeremy. I didn’t realize she knew Sonja.”

  Saint looked away, and I saw the worry in his eyes. He may not have been friends with Dessa, but he clearly didn’t like leaving her alone. I’d heard him offer to call Jeremy. She’d refused. If she couldn’t walk, and there wasn’t a car parked in the driveway, how did she get the things she needed? Did she work? Had Sonja been providing for her and the kids? Even if Sonja stopped by now and then, how did she manage the rest of the time? I knew Sonja wasn’t rolling in cash. I’d seen the beater she drove, and noticed her clothes and shoes were far from new. Not that I’d ever gone there. Not once had I touched her intimately.

  My stomach knotted at the thought of leaving her without a way to take care of herself. I knew being in a wheelchair didn’t make her useless. But if it had really only been ten months, I had a feeling she was still adjusting to the hand life had dealt her. How many things had she had to relearn?

  I gave myself a mental slap. None of my concern. I had my daughter, and Merlin’s son. That’s all that mattered.

  “Pres,” Wraith said, stepping up beside me. “Think Tempest is trying to get your attention. Something seems to be wrong with the kids.”

  I glanced over and saw him looking a little green as he waved at me. I wondered what the hell could go wrong this early on the trip and strode over to the truck to see what was going on. The moment I opened the back door, the smell hit me.

  “What the hell?” I covered my nose with my shirtsleeve.

  “Merlin’s kid cried and screamed so much he puked everywhere.”

  “I guess that’s a no to the milk, then,” I said. “Someone go back inside and see if they have a roll of paper towels. If not that, then maybe some shop rags. And plastic bags.”

  “I want Momma.” Judd whimpered. A tear slid down his cheek. “Where’s Momma?”

  Shit. I felt like an asshole. “That woman wasn’t your mother, Judd.”

  He started crying harder, then the retching began again. At this rate, the kid couldn’t have anything left in his stomach. I’d only thought to get the kids and take them home. It never occurred to me they’d bond with whoever had been taking care of them. Of course, I hadn’t expected someone like Dessa either. When we’d burst into the house, she’d asked us not to hurt them. Not once had she offered up the kids in order to save herself. She’d held them as if she wanted to protect them.

  “We’re not going back for that bitch, are we?” Tempest asked. “She kept the kids from us.”

  “She didn’t know,” Saint said. “I believe her. The Dessa I knew would have never done something like that. Not willingly. Sonja used her the same as she used Merlin and the kids’ mothers.”

  “You think because she’s a fucking cripple that she couldn’t have been in on it?” Tempest asked.

  I fisted my hand and ground my teeth together. I didn’t know where all the animosity was coming from. Tempest had a short fuse, hence his name, but this was fucking ridiculous.

  “Don’t call her that,” Saint said. “You have no idea what she’s been through. Her fiancé walked out on her because of that chair. Now her foster sister is gone, and we took these kids from her. We left her with nothing.”

  Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Saint was right. “I’m going back,” I said.

  “Fine. But we need to get the kids back to the compound and settled. You want to go back for that woman afterward that’s on you.” Tempest walked off, and I knew I’d need to have a few words with him later. Something was wrong. In all the years I’d known him, not once had he acted like this, especially when it came to a woman. Club whores didn’t count. They tended to be manipulative and calculating. Dessa hadn’t seemed to be like that.

  He wasn’t wrong about taking the kids home. I’d leave them with Ares, then head back for Dessa. They didn’t need to be in the truck longer than necessary, but if I didn’t talk to them first, the next hour would be miserable.

  Someone handed me a sack. I peered inside and saw baby wipes, a small roll of trash bags, and paper towels. I handed off the snacks to Saint, then got to work cleaning the back seat. Sure, I was the President and could make someone else clean it up, but the kids were mine. Fuck. It looked like I’d not only gained a second daughter, but now I had a son too. With some luck, he wouldn’t inherit his parents’ traits. “I’m going to go back to get Dessa, all right?” I looked from one to the other.

  “Momma?” Judd asked.

  I nodded. “Yes. I’m going to go back for your mother, but not until after I get the two of you home. I didn’t plan for two of you, so we’ll figure out rooms for everyone tomorrow. For tonight, the two of you can share Junie’s room.”

  “Who’s Ares?” Judd asked.

  Had I mentioned her? I couldn’t remember. Maybe he’d overhead me talking to one of my brothers. “My daughter. She’s in high school, and she’ll help you get settled into your new home.”

  “Sister?” Judd asked.

  I nodded. “Yes, Ares is your sister. Big sister.”

  Junie hadn’t said a word since we’d left the house. I worried about her. For a two-year-old, she seemed far too quiet. I didn’t know if she’d talked more with Dessa, or if she was always like this. My kid. She was a stranger to me, but I wanted to get to know her.

  I finished cleaning up Judd and the back seat, then threw the trash away. I also tossed the milk, not wanting to take a chance on making the kid sick again. By the time we got home, the drinks would have been too warm. After the way Judd threw up all over the car and himself, I wasn’t about to give it to him now. “Let’s get back on the road. The sooner I get you home, the faster I can go back for Dessa. All right?”

  Judd nodded and seemed to settle down. He didn’t act the way the three-year- olds at the compound did. I wondered what he’d experienced in his short life. The fact his mother sold him to Sonja gave me a few ideas. From now on, these two would get to be kids. They’d play, make friends, and when they were old enough, they’d go to school.

  I got back in the truck, and we hit the road again. By the time we got to the compound, both kids were asleep, and I wasn’t looking forward to another four hours on the road. Two to get back to Dessa, and another two home again. But I’d told Judd I’d go back for her, and I’d keep my word to him.