Dagger (Devil's Fury MC 4) Page 14

  When the doctor said he needed to remove Luis’ clothes for the last part of the exam, I knew I needed to leave the room. I couldn’t take it another moment, and I was too scared of what he might discover. By the time the visit was over, and Luis was cradled in Dagger’s arms, my heart felt like it was going to beat right out of my chest. My neck hurt from the tension in my body.

  “He took some blood to run some tests,” Guardian said as Dagger carried Luis into another room. “The exam wasn’t pleasant for any of us, but the doc saw no signs of sexual assault. I’ve never been more grateful for something in my life. If those assholes had done that to our sweet boy…”

  He swallowed hard and I saw the fury in his eyes. I knew exactly how he felt. It was bad enough Luis had been harmed in any way, but at least he’d been spared in some way. I had a feeling what he’d seen or had done to him was bad enough to give Luis nightmares. Only time would tell.

  “I’m going to contact Outlaw and give him the sequence of numbers on Luis’ hip and see if he or Wire can figure out what it means,” Guardian said. “Dagger suggested you start dinner, and we’ll all sit at the table for the meal. None of us thought to get a booster seat for Luis, so I’m going to have a Prospect run and pick one up.”

  “I don’t even know what to make,” I said.

  “Anything you want, baby. Hell, order pizza. Every kid loves that shit, right?”

  I didn’t know about that, but I could easily order pizza. It would provide us with dinner, and I wouldn’t have to lose any time with Luis. While I would have preferred to provide my son a home-cooked meal his first night in the house, there would be plenty of other opportunities.

  Provided Juan was captured and taken care of. Otherwise, our happy family could quickly unravel.

  * * *

  Jared

  Watching Luis withdraw into himself during the exam had about gutted me, but it had been the look on Dagger’s face that hurt the most. I could tell something was going on, but I didn’t know what. It was possible he’d simply formed enough of a connection with the kid during the flight here that he felt our boy’s pain more than I did, but I had a feeling it wasn’t just that. I could only hope he’d open up at some point and let me in.

  Even worse, I could see the fear and pain in Zoe’s eyes and I didn’t know how to help. I could hold her, tell her everything would be okay, but that wouldn’t be near enough. She felt like she’d done this to her son by leaving him behind, and nothing I said would ever change that. She’d have to come to terms with it on her own. As far as I was concerned, she’d done what she felt was right, and if she’d put her faith in someone trustworthy, then everything would have ended differently. Instead, she’d gotten suckered by a con man who only wanted nearly free labor, and didn’t care if her son ever made it out of Mexico or not. The small pittance he’d given her had gone back to Mexico for Luis.

  If Ramirez hadn’t already handled that asshole, I’d be tempted to go after him. What he’d done to Zoe was unforgiveable. Because of his refusal to let Zoe bring her son with her, Luis had suffered, and now Zoe felt responsible for it all. I wanted to break the man in half, literally snap his bones, but I had a feeling he was already dead. Ramirez wouldn’t have removed the women, and wouldn’t be acting as if he were in charge, if his boss were still breathing. I’d have to hope the bastard suffered a great deal.

  I listened to Zoe order dinner, but I kept an eye on her. She flitted around, her hands trembling a little. The slight quiver in her voice confirmed how anxious she was, either over Luis having been harmed, or the fact he didn’t seem too quick to go to her. I had to imagine it hurt like hell to have your own flesh and blood prefer someone else. As far as I was concerned, he was my son, as well as Zoe’s and Dagger’s. I didn’t have much experience with kids of any age, and none with someone as small as Luis, but I’d do what I could to show him he could trust me.

  Without knowing exactly what he’d been through, it was hard to say how long it would take for him to recover. I didn’t know the first thing about helping a kid heal from emotional or physical trauma, especially one who wouldn’t talk. Whatever he needed, I’d see he got it. Even if it he only needed lots of cuddles.

  Zoe finished placing the pizza order and set the phone down. Her shoulders slumped and I watched as she hung her head. I hated that she was beating herself up. Not knowing what else to do, I walked over and pulled her against my chest, wrapping my arms around her waist.

  “He’s a strong kid, baby. He’ll be okay.” I kissed the top of her head. “He has you, me, and Dagger. Not to mention the rest of the club. We’ll make sure he has whatever he needs.”

  “Doesn’t stop me from feeling like I failed him,” she said softly.

  “You didn’t. No one can see the future, Zo. You did what you felt was right at the time, and if the man you’d trusted had been honorable, or the woman you’d thought was taking care of Luis, then all this might have turned out different. But playing the what-if game isn’t going to do anything but make you hurt more. We can’t change the past, baby, but we can make sure he has a safe and happy future.”

  She sighed and leaned more of her weight against me. “I know you’re right, but I’m struggling. I promise I’ll get there. It hurts to know I couldn’t protect my son.”

  “I know.” I hugged her tighter. “We’re here for you, and for Luis. Remember that. You aren’t in this alone, baby.”

  She nodded, then turned in my arms and hugged me. I’d do whatever I could to keep our family happy. If that meant playing peacemaker sometimes, then I would. Right now, I’d lend my strength to Zoe so she could get through whatever we were about to face with Luis. No matter how strong she was, I knew she’d need help in the days to come. We all would, but none of us were alone anymore, and together I knew we could face anything.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Dagger

  I knew it was time to speak with Guardian about my past. I should have done it before now. At first, I’d been worried how he would react, then there hadn’t been time. It wasn’t something I needed to hide any longer. Not from him. I still didn’t plan to share what happened with the entire club.

  Luis had been asleep for the last hour. Even though Zoe knew what I’d been through, I didn’t think she wanted to hear it again. I went to our bathroom and started the tub, filling it with hot water so she could soak and relax. She’d had a trying day, and there were shadows under her eyes. We were all on edge after finding out Luis had been hurt, but until we knew everything, I knew none of us would sleep well.

  After I shut off the water, I went to get Zoe. She’d curled against Guardian on the couch, but the stress and tension were evident in her body. I didn’t say a word, just walked over and lifted her into my arms. I carried her to the bathroom, helped her strip down, then gave a nod to the tub.

  “Don’t even think of arguing. Just get in the tub and try to relax, princesa. I know everything going on makes it seem impossible. I’m worried about you.” I smoothed her hair back and leaned down to brush my lips against hers. “I’ll come check on you shortly.”

  I walked out, pulling the door mostly shut, then went back to the living room. Guardian sprawled on the couch, one of his booted feet on the coffee table. I shook my head. There were times I wondered if he’d been raised in a barn. “Our wife will skin you if she sees your feet on the table,” I said as I took the seat next to him.

  “She going to be okay?” he asked.

  “She blames herself. It’s not her fault. Yes, she left him, but she was trying to give him a better life. It’s not much different than someone giving their kid up for adoption. There are no guarantees in life. She sent every penny she had to that woman, but the bitch sold our boy. Zoe couldn’t have predicted that would happen, and I don’t believe she realized her debt would never be paid and Luis would still be in Mexico years later.”

  “You think he’s going to be okay?” Guardian asked. “We have no idea what he’s been through.
Since he won’t talk, and I have no idea if he understands English, I’m not sure if there’s anything I can do. Does he have any idea what I’m saying to him?”

  “I don’t know. We need to give him some time, and get him some help. I’m sure they have therapists for small kids. Maybe we should check into one, find someone Luis is comfortable with and maybe they can help him process whatever he’s seen or experienced.”

  Guardian nodded. “Not a bad idea. I may actually know someone who could point us in the right direction. If she’ll take my call.”

  “She?” I asked.

  “My sister.” He turned to face me. “I know you and I never talked before about where we came from. My family threw me out when I was thirteen, after they caught me with another boy. None of them would talk to me. I crashed where I could until I found out my parents were dead. The state rounded me up and dumped me in foster care. It took me a little while to find my sister, and I’ve reached out to her a few times. She’s a therapist now and seems more open to speaking to me, but I’ve kept my distance because of the club life. I don’t want any ugliness touching her.”

  “She work with kids?” I asked.

  “I don’t know. If she doesn’t, she may know someone who does. Want me to call now?” He looked at the screen of his phone. “Or maybe send a text. I didn’t realize it was so late.”

  “You can text, but there’s something we need to talk about first. Or rather something I need to say. First, know I didn’t keep it from you for any reason other than I was worried you’d see me differently. And the club doesn’t know. They don’t need to.”

  His gaze narrowed slightly. “You’ve kept something from me? Didn’t you tell Zoe you owe her a spanking for not telling you about Luis’ sperm donor? Now you’re hiding shit too? Does she know what this big secret is?”

  “Actually, she does.” I rubbed the back of my neck. “I told her before she agreed to marry me. I wanted her to know who I was before she took that leap.”

  “I didn’t warrant the same consideration?” Guardian asked.

  “Things were casual with us, and then they suddenly weren’t. When she disappeared that night, I wasn’t thinking straight. And I don’t think you were either. What happened, it wasn’t planned. I’d had every intention of telling you about my past before you committed to this family, and I’m sorry I took that from you.”

  He sighed and waved a hand for me to continue.

  “When I was a teenager, I lost my family. Bounced around foster homes until I couldn’t handle it anymore. The system wasn’t kind to a kid like me. Ended up on the streets. A man took me under his wing, for a price. It wasn’t horrible, and he didn’t abuse me. Until the day someone offered him money for some time with me. After that, he became my pimp. I was scrawny and fighting back wouldn’t have done me any good. At least Rick made sure I wasn’t hurt.”

  Guardian’s hands fisted on his thighs. “Not hurt? Did you want to be with him or the others?”

  I shrugged, but the answer was no. I’d done it out of necessity.

  “They raped you,” he said. “You didn’t have a choice. It was take it and survive, or what? End up in a worse position?”

  “Something like that. Anyway, I managed to get away when I was eighteen and Grizzly found me. I bulked up a few years later, and by then I had a home here. I never told anyone what I’d been running from. Guess I was too ashamed. Not to mention, I didn’t think the club would look kindly on me fucking other men.”

  Guardian reached over and took my hand. “Is that why… you’re always the top? I assumed it was because you were kind of dominant in the bedroom.”

  “I was never given the choice before. Being in control keeps me from reliving those moments. If I were bottom, I’m not sure if I’d have a flashback or some sort of attack. I probably have PTSD.”

  He nodded. “Wouldn’t surprise me. Thank you for sharing that with me. I understand a little more why you need the things you do. That sense of control isn’t just to get you off. It’s what you need to feel safe when you’re with another man. Was it always men?”

  “Yeah. If women were hiring prostitutes, they weren’t hanging in my part of town. Only women hitting the corners there were either looking for a fix or spreading their legs.”

  Guardian gripped the back of my neck and tugged me closer, kissing me. His lips barely brushed mine before he deepened the kiss. When he pulled away, I saw the acceptance in his eyes, as well as affection. “Whatever you need to feel safe, I’m okay with it. If that means you always need to be the one in control, then fine. I won’t say I’ve never wondered what it would be like to fuck you, but it’s not something I’ll push for. If you decide you want to try, let me know, but I won’t bring it up.”

  “Thank you, Jared. I guess I was worried you’d see me as dirty or something. And the club… I never expected them to accept the two of us together, so the thought of confessing that to them wasn’t something I could even contemplate. It terrified me.”

  He kissed me again, then pulled back. Our thighs brushed together even though we weren’t touching in any other way. It was enough. I checked my phone to see if Outlaw had messaged me, but I didn’t have any missed texts or calls. Guardian tapped on his phone and I assumed he was texting his sister. I hoped she would know someone who could help Luis. Poor kid. “I’m going to call Outlaw. I know he hasn’t had much time to dig up anything, but I’d like to at least get some sort of update.”

  Guardian gave me a nod, but kept texting. I didn’t know if his sister had responded, or if he was just sending a really long damn message. I dialed Outlaw’s number and waited for him to answer.

  “You don’t give anyone a lot of time, do you?” Outlaw asked as he picked up.

  “Just concerned about my boy. Find out anything at all?” I asked.

  “Wire and Lavender are working on it. My hands won’t cooperate today. Dropped my fucking coffee cup this morning and can’t grip anything for shit. Wire said he’ll message you once he has something.”

  “Thanks, and sorry it’s a shitty day.” Ever since Outlaw had sacrificed himself for Wire’s woman, he’d had a lot of issues with his hands. Some days were better than others. The club had worried about him, until he’d found Elena. Now he had a reason to get up every day. More than one. His daughter, Valeria, was only a month old and absolutely adorable.

  I started to message Grizzly, but something made me pause. I listened, feeling as if something was out of place. Had Luis woken? I got up and moved closer to the hall, but everything was quiet. I felt Guardian at my back and lifted a hand to keep him silent, then went to check on our son.

  I pushed Luis’ door open and peered inside. The sheets were mussed, but the bed was empty. Even worse, the window was open. Motherfucker!

  I ran to the bedroom, opened the safe in my closet, and pulled out several guns, arming both myself and Guardian. I strapped four blades on my person, along with a set of throwing knives. “Stay here with Zoe.”

  A quick glance toward the bathroom was enough to assure me she was still in the tub. I saw her knees bent and barely showing over the top of the tub. Except… Zoe was a tiny thing, barely five feet if even that. A feeling of unease pricked at me and I moved toward the bathroom. When I opened the door fully, my heart stopped.

  “No! Goddamnit!” I dropped the gun I’d still clutched and reached for Zoe, jerking her out of the tub. “Please, corazoncito. Don’t do this to me.”

  My hands shook as I swiped her hair off her face and tipped her head back. I put my face near her nose and mouth, but didn’t feel the stir of her breath. I placed my ear against her chest and realized her heart had stopped beating. I was seconds from losing it, and I knew I needed to get Luis back as well, but I couldn’t just leave her…

  “Move, Dagger. I know CPR. Go get that fucker,” Guardian said.

  “Bring her back. Whatever it takes.” I stood and forced myself from the room, but it was the hardest thing I’d ever done. How the fuck
had that asshole gotten in undetected, not only the compound but my fucking house? He’d killed Zoe without us being any the wiser, and snatched Luis. I’d failed my family.

  I pulled my phone from my pocket as I exited the house. I sent one text, but included all the club officers. Luis is missing, and Zoe isn’t breathing.

  I put the phone on silent, then made my way around to Luis’ bedroom window. I saw the boot marks of someone with a smaller foot but a heavy tread. They were deep, but he had to wear a size seven, maybe an eight. Cigarettes littered the ground, which meant he’d been out here a while. At least long enough to smoke five of them. Had he been here when we’d put our son to bed? Just waiting for the moment to strike?

  I’d put off searching for him, wanting to have a nice evening with my family, and look what it had cost me. My heart ached, and my throat burned with unshed tears. He’d taken everything, and I’d make him fucking pay. I heard the roar of bikes and knew help was on the way, but was it too late? Were both Zoe and Luis lost to us already?

  I followed the steps to the road, then noticed they continued on the other side. I waited, as much as it pained me to do so, until my brothers arrived. I could tell by the sound of the pipes they were drawing closer and would be here any second. I heard them pull up to the house.

  Around the side. I sent the message, then started following the prints. Demon, Slash, and Hot Shot joined me. “Left Stitches at your house,” Slash said. “Called an ambulance too. So if we’re catching this asshole, we need to do it fast. I have no doubt the police will come too, or follow up at the very least.”

  “Tracks lead toward the back of the compound,” I said.

  We tracked Juan, stopping at the back fence. The prints abruptly halted, or so it seemed. I scanned the area and realized he’d somehow managed to hold onto Luis and climbed the fence. Except he hadn’t gone over. The footsteps started back up about eight feet away.